I hate goodbyes

Today, one my my closest and dearest friend moved to Germany. I have not known her for as long as I have known some of my other BFFs but she has definitely become one my besties over the years. She has constantly been there for me in the past couple of years when my life kinda mimicked a roller coaster ride. She always had faith in me even when I had none in myself. And she is always always rooting for my happiness. Most importantly she never judges my actions - even when I do the stupidest things. She really made it easier for me to pick up the pieces whenever my relationships fall apart.

I cried buckets when I was sending her off. She cried. I cried. Sigh. What a mess. I cried while driving home. I cried after I got home. I really am gonna miss having her around. All the crazy things that we got up to. Our drunken boozy nights out. Our long drawn out lunch and gossip sessions (yes we are guilty of gossiping at times).

Why is it that as we get older, goodbyes become harder to say? I remember when I was much younger, goodbyes were so much easier for me to say. Even when I was leaving to further my studies in the UK, I never felt sad to leave behind my family and friends and conversely when I was leaving UK to come back home I never felt sad to to leave behind all my new found friends. Goodbyes never used to fazed me.

But as I grew older, goodbyes became harder to say. I started to know what it is like to miss your family. Your friends. Your significant other. Goodbyes now meant a red nose and puffy eyes. I guess I grew more human as a I grew older? Maybe my feelings matured over the years.

Yesterday, I sent someone else off at the airport as well. I wished him goodbye and he replied "No, not goodbye. See you later."